PWI is DUH and other news

Wrestling news that went after the injured left eye of its opponent until the ref was forced to stop the match:

*Gas prices are through the roof, huge banks are going to pieces, the international picture is uncertain, and now, the final nail in the coffin. Randall Orton is named Wrestler of the Year. Civilization is doomed.

In a related note, Bret Hart is furious because PWI only ranked him #14. Either Apter goes or he goes. Ok, Apter isn't going, Bret's going to his hotel room.

The PWI cover is actually pretty funny, as it includes this rationale for choosing Randall: "who else?" He won by default!

*Help fight AIDS and you could win lunch with Kevin Nash! It should be noted, however, that Nash was scheduled for one of these lunches last year but he convinced the booker that the other lunch guests couldn't draw and he had lunch with Hogan and DDP instead.

*Rey Mysterio says WWE isn't paying him enough to be injured all the time and may choose to be injured all the time for AAA instead. The Cubs pitching staff is also an option.

*Who's weirder, the Ultimate Warrior, or the 100 or so people who paid $55 each to get the Warrior's autograph? Yeah, it's still Warrior.

*JR says the rumors that he's going back to RAW aren't true because this "has never been discussed" by him and WWE officials. After all, they'd never switch JR from one brand to another without telling him.