"You drove through the wall of a nursing home, stole a patient's wheelchair, drove the suspect down a hallway in the stolen wheelchair and launched him out a sixth story window, all without reading the suspect his Miranda rights! What have you got to say for yourself, Callahan?"
"I'm smooth, Chief."

I can't imagine what release forms must look like for contestants on this show. "Contestant acknowledges that he/she may be caned by a man wearing a surgical mask during the course of production, and agrees not to hold the producers liable in such event."