The blogosphere is still abuzz about "Snakes On a Liquid Cargo Barge", largely because they suggested Jackson's new catchphrase, “I'm so glad I didn't take a motherf___ing liquid fuel barge to motherf___ing Belgium.”

“My wrists still hurt like hell, but I found this really funny episode of 'Will It Curdle?' on YouTube! This is medical treatment that understands my generation.”

The director's cut features a naked WOODY HARRELSON repeatedly chanting “Mun-chies! Mun-chies! Mun-chies!” atop a 75-foot tall replica of Al Gore's Powerbook.

"We don't have kids, but we do have magic pixies living in the garden. I don't want them to worry at night if I'm going to get up and try to sell them a home gym or a collection of lite-rock hits from the 70's.”

The Journal of Insipid Discovery once calculated the cost of getting John Travolta to retire from acting. The answer: $46 billion. Thanks to a bequest from one of the region's “filthy rich,” the Journal has plenty of money of its own – not $46 billion, mind you, but closer than you're ever going to get, deadbeat!